Wednesday, February 21, 2007

how do you spell cap? c-r-a-p?

every once in a while i have an angry post. this is one of them. apparently, the companies that manufacture those cute little infant caps are run by people who don't have little babies. or they are just plain morons.

"hmmmm, let's make little skull caps for little babies, and let's make sure we include a bunch of important features to keep parents (our customers) happy:"
  1. use fabric that won't fit snugly on a baby's head
  2. make sure that the hats slide right off, or...
  3. make sure that the hats slide down over the baby's eyes
  4. make sure groggy parents who are trying to keep their baby cozy, calm, and asleep cannot possibly put the hat on with one hand while they hold their kid with the other
  5. under normal circumstances, the application of the hat on the baby's head should be designed to wake the baby from any stage of sleep in order to create as much crying as possible
if you make infant caps, here's a bet that you don't have a baby of your own, or, if you ever did, you are too old to remember anything about taking care of a baby.

the only hat that worked was the one in the hospital. now they know what they're doing.

no nurse would stand for the crap i have to put up with trying to get a hat onto jaden at night to keep her little brain warm so she can grow up and have strong emotional reactions to relatively benign issues like her dad.

if you know where to get the little knit caps they give babies in hospital nurseries, send me a note or post a comment.

screw you mr. crappy-baby-hat-maker.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

go to the hospital and buy a box...mm
call the hospital and ask for the cap website...mm
start a new business...manufacture "the clever cap"...go on HSN and sell a Trillion and make a Million...mm
get on Oprah and explain the inadequecies of the world and the secret of changing crappy caps into clever caps!!!!...mm